The unbelievable lightness of beans

Men spend their lives in anticipation, in determining to be vastly happy at some period when they have time. But the present time has one advantage over every other -- it is our own. Past opportunities are gone, future have not come. -- Charles C. Colton

As I sit here, riding down the coattails of another week in January, I am suddenly aware that I am always waiting for something to come along to change my life. I'll eat right, and exercise tomorrow when I have more time. Oh, I really need to get a different job... I'd really like to work in the video game industry somehow. I should send a resume. Then when tomorrow comes I make the same, or another excuse to put it off. It's the classic paradigm of procrastination.

What is so daunting about these seemingly trivial little tasks that move me toward a desired goal? I think in some ways I'm afraid of failure. Not the typical oh, my life is ruined because my dreams are smashed kind of failure. The failure that comes with learning something new. The trial and error of becoming an accomplished pianist. The countless hours of paperwork required to be an Accountant. The punching the clock WORK of doing something I love. I don't like to equate my passions to the drivel of work. So I escape.


On a lighter note, I've been escaping a lot into some great video games. Still #1 on my play list is Left 4 Dead 2. There's something great about the direct connection I have with my teammates as we try to overcome the relentless onslaught of the undead. The new AI director is just as awful as the original, and there are still some pretty egregious flaws in the collision detection, however the constant pressure to make quick decisions and alter plans is thrilling! It's a plus if you can also live with pretty consistent lag.





I also picked up playing Shadow Complex again. It's loosely based on Orson Scott Card's Empire. I went through the main story line this summer, but never stayed to collect all the items. I started a new play through which doesn't let you keep the items you had, but it does show the complete map. Maybe another 2 or 3 hours to get the all items achievement.






Finally, the coup de grâce for this week's purchases is Magic: The Gathering – Duels of the Planeswalkers. How to describe it... Okay, you know that card game Magic? Well this is it. On your TV. You can totally escape the social ostracism because you've already selected to ostracize yourself to play this game at home on your XBOX! It was just $5 this week, and I thought it would be a lot of fun to play here and there. It is. Great, high res graphics and cards. Pretty basic... you can't really customize your deck, but still a lot of fun.